Death and Dying – Presence 2

As stated, both life and death require our presence, showing up in a way that speaks of meaning and engagement. Unfortunately, the shadow side of presence can also occur in death and dying, life and living.   In the shadow side of presence, we do not show up. We instead ignore, deny, and push engagement of ourselves and others to the side.

When we lack presence, we harm ourselves, as we are not engaged enough to exert our power. When we are partially present or completely absent, we suffer through feeling discouraged and disconnected.  The lack of presence is one way people attempt to cope with death and dying, either their own or those they love.  The thought goes, “If I am not present, than I can not suffer.”  Even in pain, death, just as life, asks us to show up in the best way we can.  Not for the benefit of others, but for our own benefit.  We can, through our presence, acknowledge that death, and in turn life, matters.

What is to be gained by a lack of presence around death and dying?      


Do you think people struggle to be present for both death and dying and life and living at the same time?   

2 thoughts on “Death and Dying – Presence 2

  1. Grief can be so overwhelming, that we wish to stop the pain by withdrawing. As I have found, that may bring temporary relief, but in the long run, it doesn’t serve us. The unexpressed pain festers and illness (mental or physical) can develop. Good stuff to ponder, Kim.


    • Oh, Eliza, it is always so nice to hear from you. I so agree with what you wrote. Grief is often overwhelming, and, of course, we are designed to attempt to lessen our pain. But, as we know, grief happens on so many levels within us that we can not withdraw fully. It is part of our being and experience, and as you write, it must be acknowledged and expressed.

      Liked by 1 person

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